Eeeeeeee!
Those are my absolute favorite kind of gifts. I felt special. And loved.
And I am still smiling as I type this.
Love you honey!!!
“You should start writing again”
“But I don’t have anything good to say. I have writers block” I whined.
“Maybe you should open your bible” was his answer.
Ouch. Like really ouch.
Man, it bugs me when he’s right.
God uses my husband. To speak love over me and make me feel like I’m the only woman in the world. He also uses him to softly discipline me. To reveal the ugliness in my heart or to bring light to my shortcomings. Both are a gift to me.
Chris sees the real me and isn’t afraid to call me on it.
He didn’t say “maybe you should open your bible” in a mean or spiteful way, but rather matter of fact. A simple sentence that cut deep. Because it was true.
If you are married, your spouse probably knows you more intimately than anyone else.
When Chris and I argue he sometimes says things to me that I wish he wouldn’t but I think the part that hurts the most is the fact that most times there is an element of truth to what he is saying and the truth hurts.
It’s usually not that I disagree with what is being said about me, it’s just that I don’t like it.
We don’t like the ugly in us. The selfishness. The pride. And we try to pretend that they are wrong and that we are perfect….. but the truth is we’re just not.
I had a long and hard conversation with a dear friend of mine the other morning and afterwards I realized just how much we are clouded by hurt. Just how much we react out of that hurt. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and tell her it would all be ok. I wanted to take away all the hurt she was feeling, and help her to see above that cloudiness, but I’m not sure that I did. Hurt is tricky that way. We can start to let it go, but then the smallest trigger can send us back into a tailspin.
When I’m hurt I want to come to Jesus. I want to come humbly. In realness. Not as a victim, but as a daughter who knows she’s messed up.
Because, I’m learning that in every situation I am given an opportunity. An opportunity to allow God to prune out a little more ugly from my heart. I can choose to stay prideful and hurt or I can pray and be open to what God wants to show me about myself.
I can leave the part that was hurtful and simply not true and take away the real element of truth.
It’s so much easier to see the ugly in others. How we were wronged. How we’ve been hurt.
It’s a lot harder to allow God into the parts of our heart that he wants to change.
Harder but necessary.
Because, for me, these are the parts that most often I am not even aware of until I spend time weeping at his feet over whatever incident just occurred. And, friends, I find that it is in those times that I am broken and hurt over whatever offense it may be that my Father will gently show me where I need to change. Where I need to soften. Where I need to grace. Where I need to let go. Where I need to confess.
What a shock the first time that happened. When I was complaining about someone else and he showed me my own ugly. Ouch. Like, really OUCH.
But that is the beauty that is our Father. He loves us enough to change us.
And I’m slowly getting better at letting Him.
I love Jesus, my guy Chris + our four. We seek joy. Homeschool. Adventure together. Mess up and start again.
first, now i love your husband… because he loves you.
from John 15
"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful."
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.
"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love."
your post made me think of these words. these words mulling around in my head this week.
God prunes us because he loves us. and he wants nothing more than for us to be fruitful. our fruitfulness is not only for his glory, but also so our joy will be made complete.
may God continue to shape and mold you and i both for his glory dear friend, and may we enjoy the delicious fruit being produced in our lives, our husbands, our children.
Ok, Chris has VERY good taste in surprise gifts – ha! That Belly Butter is my best friend for the slow burning itch that comes with an expanding Bump!
And as for the rest of your post – thank you Sara. God uses friendships and your words, well, let's just say I've been seeing a whole lotta ugly in me that I am so ready to shed. Sometimes you need someone who loves you (like the Chris' in our lives…or the humble, honest Sara's) that knock you upside the head and say "just go to Jesus".
Thankfully, His mercies are new every morning and we can trust He makes all things (including our ugly) beautiful again….
Thanks for sharing that post! I so hear you, I have one of those husbands too; and I think it takes a lot of courage to say those things in love. (as they aren't always so easily received).
I think you have such a beautiful spirit about you! A true type of friend who loves the Lord first. Awesome!
Your right it is a big ouch! Honestly whenever I look back when God does that to me I'm so thankful because of the change that happens in me. It makes me a better and stronger person.
My husband doesn the same thing… :0)
I agree…. Ouch. But what often times seems like an ouch turns out to be an amazing eye opening, life changing moment. Jason and I will be married 11 years next week. I love how at times he will say things like "when you think about it, you will understand." Man, I don't want him to be right but when I think about it, pray about, I understand so clearly what he meant. So happy you are writting again.
BIG HUGS!!!
It is such a relief when someone (not just my husband)points out what I need to hear. Because, if I'm honest, I knew it to be true before they said it.
Keep on writing- you are amazing!
When you write a post called "Truth in Love" and then you post some pictures of soap, it kinda leads me to believe I was trying to tell you something else 🙂 You really do smell good!
I love you babe!!
What sweet gifts from your husband – both the tangible and intangible ones.
Thanks for your honesty. I know those kinds of moments you're talking about. It definitely takes humility to accept the truth about ourselves!
But where we are humbled, He is exalted.
Your right it is a big ouch! Honestly whenever I look back when God does that to me I'm so thankful because of the change that happens in me. It makes me a better and stronger person.
My husband doesn the same thing… :0)
Ok, Chris has VERY good taste in surprise gifts – ha! That Belly Butter is my best friend for the slow burning itch that comes with an expanding Bump!
And as for the rest of your post – thank you Sara. God uses friendships and your words, well, let's just say I've been seeing a whole lotta ugly in me that I am so ready to shed. Sometimes you need someone who loves you (like the Chris' in our lives…or the humble, honest Sara's) that knock you upside the head and say "just go to Jesus".
Thankfully, His mercies are new every morning and we can trust He makes all things (including our ugly) beautiful again….
When you write a post called "Truth in Love" and then you post some pictures of soap, it kinda leads me to believe I was trying to tell you something else 🙂 You really do smell good!
I love you babe!!